Is this how I loved you?

I go for a run on this beautiful sunny day in winter. Everything is dry, yet vivacious. The warm weather feels like being near a stove -gentle, kind, but after a minute too long, it becomes overwhelming. I take off my long sleeved shirt and run in peace, huffing and puffing. Music keeps me going. And this song comes on. It’s been so long since I heard it, as soon as it starts playing something in me clicks, I no longer huff, nor puff, it’s like a message from myself to me, even the eerie laughter at the end.

Here is the translation:

Don’t categorize me

Song by Sezen Aksu, written and composed by Bulent Ortacgil, translated by ChatGPT

Don’t categorize me
Don’t play games with me
Don’t label me
Don’t give me a name
Don’t caricature me
Don’t deify me
Don’t turn me into a taboo
Don’t turn me into property

I loved you like this, loved you like this
I loved you like this, is that how I loved you?

Don’t mathematize me
Don’t multiply, divide
Don’t add or subtract me
Don’t reduce me to calculations

Don’t mechanize me
Don’t automate me
Don’t compare me to this or that
Don’t contrast me

I loved you like this, loved you like this
I loved you like this, is that how I loved you?

I loved you like this, loved you like this
I loved you like this, is that how I loved you?

Don’t compress or cram me
Don’t turn me into storage
Don’t let my feelings disappear
Don’t harden my heart

Don’t demoralize me
Don’t depoliticize me
I’ve started to flee from everything
Don’t criminalize me

I loved you like this, loved you like this
I loved you like this, is that how I loved you?

I loved you like this, loved you like this
I loved you like this, is that how I loved you?

Is this how I loved you?
Is this how I loved you?

How do you love yourself and the world around you?